Monday, June 28, 2010

SpeNt.... but notice the beauty left behind..........

This photo is from my yard.... and the roses that I grow and get to admire.  About a month ago...I remember thinking in a very selfish way... " Dang... I wish those blooms lasted longer."  But then I looked again, and noticed how perfectly perfect those "stars" were......... hidden underneath all the lovely.
Wow... beauty beyond the flower. Shame on me for not noticing it before.

Everything has a shelf life... : )

We rarely think of our own , and rarely think of  those of others in our lives,  unless we know it's near by...

The part that is so difficult, of course is experiencing the actual loss of a shelf life... period.  No matter of circumstance... but it becomes a different kind of loss when that shelf life was cut in half... out of the blue, with no rhyme or reason that can be assigned to it.

I want to say that...  the  reason I feel like this now is due to an abundant amount of grief  ( in a bizarre short period of time) shared by some of the people I care about most on the planet.

I want who ever reads this to know that the loss I speak of is personal to me, but not necessarily my personal own... and this is in the order of events....

Many people don't relate to this... but I'm in love with my hounds beyond.....whatever.......
Some of our closest  friends have had to euthanize two of the most fantastic animals within a year. 
Dogs shelf life ... one of my main beefs in  life... don't even get me started!  Shanna and Maggie ♥

The closest  to my extended family , is my brother in laws mother... who was an inspirational woman who I unfortunately did not know well enough... the loss is mine,  I'm certain of this.  Nora's shelf life was cut in half by a disease,  not necessarily age... she had many grand years ahead of her, that were robbed of  her by alzheimers.  I grieve her death mostly for my brother in law,  and my precious niece and nephew, as they were also robbed... due to her shelf life.

Most tragic to me was the loss of  a wonderfully, innocent, extremely  pleasant, and talented young lady.   Alayna Bowman...a  16 year old  with her whole  life ahead of her.  Her shelf life was cut waaaaaay short due to a young 22 year old drunk driver.  Alayna was one of my nieces childhood friends. She was destined to , and most certainly would have had a wonderful life ahead of her.

And then we have Big Jim... who just happens to be the father of one of  my dearest and most cherished friends...EVER.  What a shelf life he had!!!  If anyone was the recharger bunny... it was Big Jim.  And deserving so... doesn't even begin to describe it.  He always had a goal in life and met every one of  them... He fought the good fight... all his life and WON.
His legacy will be forever lasting....and how could it not with 13 children!!  : )   But I need to add how... his legacy will live on, with bravery and honor... for all who new him,  and  were better for it.

With a heavy heart... I respectfully love and cherish all my friends and family thru this difficult period of time.   And I embrace evermore, the reminder of our "shelf life" ... that we all have one,  but that there is always the beauty forever left behind....the SpeNt.....

xoxo ~ ajae


  1. A very sad but touching blog post Ajae, I am glad you shared it. I am sorry for the losses you have had to endure, and even if they are not directly your own it does not necessarily make the grieving any less. In some cases it can be stronger, these are people that you have made it your business to get to know, rather than knowing them because they are your family. Love, Beverley xx

  2. You help all of these people live on simply by remembering them, and also by remembering the way they touched your life and the lives of those around you...

    I love you, friend!

  3. So sorry Ajae. My heart is heavy for and with you. Death is such a difficult thing for me and I have a hard time gleaning any "beauty" from it. I admire you for the ability to do so. Consider yourself bigkittyhugged. ♥AK

  4. Dear Bev.. thank you! I always love your take on things. Every time you sit down to correspond, it's always very sincere and meaningful.
    I haven't checked out "the meeting room" lately... I will slip on over this eve : )
    xoxo ajae

  5. Goog... I love you too ♥ thanks for supporting this wacky chicka! So glad to have "found you"...

  6. Ak... so glad your out and about :) This week is off to a decent start for me and I hope the same is true for you. Mannny thanks for the support. Just know I'll always return the favor!
    It's quite interesting to me that when I sit down to blog here... my feelings become so much clearer. I know they are there and exist, but to define them and give them a voice really helps me process things, no matter if it's a good feeling or a bad one. I'm diggin' it...
    xoxo ajae

  7. Hi, flying by to "follow" you and others in our group and so glad I did. Your blog is gorgeous and I love the "cross my heart and hope to fly" (why didn't I think of that? I think when I see something so cute). I'm sending you a {hug} as I am what people think is crazy for my animals, I lost Romeo last year, then my Dad which was sooo hard. I still have little Juliet and she's so happy every day I just take a bit from her. I feel you, feel free to fly by if you're in the neighborhood ;-) Fan page!/pages/Me-Myself-and-You/105043419547115

  8. Ahh Ajae so sad. I have had many people in my life with short shelf life. I have watched them pass. I believe they were some of the most beautiful moments in my life. I know that sounds odd but it makes you value life just a little bit more. And value the people that you lose. So sorry for your sadness.

  9. Linda,
    Wow, thank you girl for stopping in :) with your kind regards.
    I'm sorry for your losses this past year. My heart is heavy for you... Your Juliet must be so fabulous, and I'm sure she knows she makes you feel better.
    Off to check out your blog... xo ajae

  10. Heather,
    I know exactly what you mean... I don't think it's odd at all! (I have also been there when loved ones have passed) I definitely appreciate the value of life, and try everyday to embrace the now, for myself and all others in my life...
    I can't thank you enough for taking a moment to stop in... as I know you are crazy busy with your own art endevours.... it means alot to me♥ xo ajae